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Withnail and I
| Hollywood executives have announced that there will be a remake of the classic movie Withnail & I. The original is revered as a classic by many, who will be awaiting the release of this new version with much trepidation, bordering on despair. The film is to be directed by acclaimed director Uwe Boll, who admits that he just 'didn't get' the sense of humour in the original version. "What I am about," the director (famous for such films as 'House Of The Dead', 'Alone In The Dark' and the recently announced 'Far Cry') explained, "is to reimagine the film with more action. Maybe add some more immediately accessible comedy characters, and use a narrator to keep the story ticking along, as well as providing wise-cracks. You know the bit with the bull, in the field? Well, maybe they could have a slapstick, Benny Hill-style chase around the field, and then when they escape from the field, the narrator can say 'What a load of bull!'. Hey - that's good! I'm going to use that!" Eager to placate fans of the classic film, Boll insists that the new version will stay true to the spirit of the original. "They will still be actors, of course. I don't think you could really get away with producing this film where, say, they were farmers, or skydivers, you know! Yes, they will be actors. Famous movie actors. But the film will now be set in New York! And instead of going on holiday to the country, they will be sent on a film assignment to Mexico! With the bandits and the tequila, that will make for a great movie!" Boll continues. "The original was so slow moving, I found. I've tried to watch it three times now, and I fell asleep every time! Ha - maybe I'm not the best person to be remaking it! No, no, I joke. Of course I am best." Starring Matt Le Blanc as Withnail, Helen Baxendale as 'I' (also the love interest), and Will Ferrell as Uncle Matty (renamed for the American market, and now a slightly campy American Football coach), look out for Withnail & I's triumphant return to the screen in the second quarter of 2006! |
Little Ghost Story
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David Copper Field (fiction)
| 'Go you below, my love,' said Mr. Murdstone. 'David2000 and I will come down, together.' When we two were left alone, he shut the door, and sitting on a chair, and holding me standing before him, looked steadily into my optical sensors. I felt my own circuits attracted, no less steadily, to his human eyes. As I recall our being opposed thus, face to face, I seem again to hear my cooling fan whirring fleet and loud. 'David2000,' he said, making his lips thin, by pressing them together, 'if I have an obstinate horse or dog to deal with, what do you think I do?' 'I don't know.' 'I beat him.' |
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Space 1999 |
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The generic adventures of Mario |
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Nemi |
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