The Ninth Gate - a review

I just remembered the worst film ever. It's called The Ninth Gate.

The story follows a dealer of rare books, played by Johnny Depp, who is hired by some weird satanist to find the original "Ninth Gate" book, which is, like, a million years old and written by The Devil, or something.

Along the way, Johnny Depp starts to find dead people whose deaths are mirrored in this old book that The Devil wrote, or something.

The story bounds along rather nicely. It doesn't make sense, but it really is very nice and atmospheric and interesting.

Then he meets a young lady who he likes. And they start having sex, and that. Then, he follows her to a castle to start having sex again, but during sex, she pushes him down a hole.

He looks up at her all "Help me" and that, and she looks down at him and she's all "Whatever".

Then the camera zooms out of the castle, and the woman rides up, naked, on a weird multi-headed dragon and stares at the camera. Then the camera zooms out some more. And that is the end.

The end of the worst film ever.