The Twenty Fucking Questions General Knowledge Quiz

1) Members of the Coronation street cast and the Baader Meinhof gang have formed a motorcycle display team. But how many of them are from Corrie and how many are from the gang?

a) 3 from Corrie, 3 from the Baader Meinhof gang
b) 4 from Corrie, 2 from the Baader Meinhof gang
c) 5 from Corrie, 1 from the Baader Meinhof gang
d) 2 from Corrie, 4 from the Baader Meinhof gang

2) Which of the following is the only world ranked British tennis player to have publicly voiced their support for the National Front?

a) Buster Mottram
b) Virginia Wade
c) Tim Henman
d) Fred Perry

3) Eco-hypocrite Jamiroquai is having a bizarre nightmare about icy roads. His sleepwalking has led him to try and grit the icy roads with cakes. But which type of cakes?

a) Dundee cakes
b) Eccles cakes
c) Cupcakes
d) Upside cakes

4) Amongst other things, the first Polaroid camera in the UK was used for which of the following purposes?

a) To document exorcisms carried out at the House of Lords by the Archbishop of Canterbury.
b) As a propaganda tool to demonstrate the superiority of Western technology over its Communist rival.
c) To help determine whether a speeding car has at least one wheel on the road at all times.
d) To photograph a member of the aristocracy sucking off a Government minister.

5) Bored scientists have created a creature that is 50% dragon, 50% Jeremy Clarkson, but 100% pure melody. What song is the creature singing?

a) Aaliyah - Try Again
b) Adamski - Killer
c) All Saints - I Know Where It's At
d) The Spice Girls - Wannabe

6) The Chilean football team used which joke shop product to try and get a match called off?

a) Fake poo
b) Laxatives
c) Fake blood
d) Whoopy cushion

7) The latest microscopic painting from Brit Art idiots The Pissfeet Brothers is based on which famous work of art?

a) Adoration of the Magi
b) St. Matthew and the Angel
c) The creation of Adam
d) The creation of the Sun and Moon

8) Which war film have "Biscuits 4 Justice" (a renegade faction of The British Biscuit Board) altered so that the heads of the actors and major landmarks have been replaced with a biscuit assortment?

a) Platoon
b) Saving Private Ryan
c) The Dirty Dozen
d) Force 10 from Navarone

9) In 1927 workshy Australian scientists devised an experiment which consisted of sitting around watching "tar pitch" drip from a funnel and into a beaker positioned below. By the year 2005, how many times had those good for nothing scientists had to pick up their pens to record a blob of tar plopping into the beaker?

a) 153 times
b) Never
c) 8 times
d) 19 times

10) Keith Harris' new sidekick is commonly associated with which of these islands?

a) Whitsun Island
b) Easter Island
c) Christmas Island
d) Bank Holiday Island

11) Which of these countries has a Space Shuttle statue as its celebratory focal point to its (in reality non-existent) space programme, and tells it citizens that a working version of that statue is part of its "space fleet"?

a) North Korea
b) Turkmenistan
c) Belgium
d) Iran

12) The "Yes Car Credit" woman has used her ill deserved earnings to renovate four staircases in her mansion, each now featuring the face of a Hollywood star. Which staircase is that stocking-clad shitpie currently walking down?

a) The Bale staircase?
b) The Travolta staircase?
c) The Stiller staircase?
d) The Affleck staircase?

13) Which comedian appeared at the 1983 Conservative Party conference, walked onto stage and yelled "Let's Bomb Russia!". A sentiment that received rapturous applause from the audience?

a) Jim Davidson
b) Roy 'Catchphrase' Walker
c) Norman Collier
d) Kenny Everett

14) To cut down on the cost of Christmas, Jason Donovan has made his pal Liam Gallagher a Monopoly board using paper, crayons and a lot of love, but unfortunately the board isn't 100% accurate. How many things are wrong with it?

a) 4
b) 3
c) 6
d) 5

15) Yet again Halle Berry has failed to stop after knocking someone over! But what model of car is she driving?

a) Peugeot
b) Jaguar
c) TVR
d) Hyundai

16) Which of these half-baked Deans was known as "the Eastern Bloc Elvis"?

a) Christopher Dean
b) Dean Martin
c) Dean Reed
d) Hazel Dean

17) Research company YouGov have made a colourful pie chart of which famous story?

a) Treasure Island
b) Robinson Crusoe
c) Lord Of The Flies
d) Swiss Family Robinson

18) Short-arsed aliens have landed on Earth and are currently trying to establish contact with a sheep. A sheep of what nationality?

a) A Czech sheep
b) A Danish sheep
c) A Welsh sheep
d) A Dutch sheep

19) Enemies of freedom (tm) are trying to unsettle Britains "deaf posse" through the medium of TV subtitles. Which country is responsible for these distorted subtitles from the 'How Clean Is Your House?' show?

a) Argentina
b) Iran
c) Canada
d) Cuba

20) Which of these cubicles contains a star who paid out over a million pounds in out of court settlements after being accused of filming women using the bathroom facilities?

a) Trap 1
b) Trap 2
c) Trap 3
d) Trap 4